How to get totally fat during the holidays

Every year around this time, I start seeing a lot of articles about how not to get fat during the holiday season.  Stuff like "bring an apple to the party" or "Walking 2 extra laps around the track will help you burn off half of that holiday cookie!".   Or best yet "park far away when you're going shopping to get the exercise".

I park far away when I shop.  But not to burn 5 calories while inhaling insane amounts of car exhaust.  It's because I live in damn Orange County and trying to park anywhere close at South Coast Plaza in December is my idea of hell.

I'd like to propose that we all just chillax and enjoy the holiday season.

There are probably about five times during the holiday season when you're really going to indulge:   Christmas (or insert other religious holiday of choice...if you're celebrating Hanukkah, those 8 crazy nights may indeed break the diet more than my projections), Thanksgiving, Some sort of random cookie binge session, and about two big holiday parties, assuming you have a moderate amount of friends.

Sure sure...there will be people around the office offering you random crap to eat, but if you usually eat that stuff in moderation during the rest of the year, you're probably not going to go hog-wild on them just because Santa is coming to town.   So here's the breakdown:

Holiday Party #1:  Some random work party that your sig o (or awkward date) brought you to.  You decide not to completely embarrass them, so in addition to a normal dinner, you pretend you're on Mad Men and drink the following:
2 Old Fashioneds and a Vodka Gimlet. And you have a piece of Apple Pie.
Total Damage: 180 + 180 + 110 + 400 = 870 Calories

Cookie Binge:  The host of the last party insisted you took stuff home.  So instead of taking it into the office like you said you would, you got up at 2 AM for a "bite" and they all ended up mysteriously disappearing.   10 medium-ish cookies.
Total Damage:  1200 Calories

Holiday Party #2:  Your ex shows up with his new girlfriend.   She's not cute at all, but it's still annoying. Also, some random girl won't stop talking about her oatmeal being amazeballs.  So you really booze it up.  And you are the best dancer at that party, fa sho.
7 Coronas and some chips.
Total Damage:  140 x 7 + 200 = 1180 Calories

Thanksgiving:  You eat a lot of crap.  Wine, rolls, stuffing, turkey, cranberry sauce, pie...etc....
Then you wash it down with a bottle of wine while listening to your cousin tell you about her new awesome job/baby/husband/life and ask you why you haven't settled down yet.
Total  Damage:  1500 (dinner) + 500 (wine) = 2000 Calories

Christmas (...or insert extra holiday of choice...):  Repeat of Thanksgiving.  Except this time you eat the Whitman's sampler instead of the wine.
Total Damage:  2000 Calories

So here's what your five days of fun will cost you:  7250 Calories.


Number of Calories in a Pound?  About 3500.

Total Weight Gain?  2.07 lbs.

2.07 lbs?
That's not all that bad...

I say go for it, you crazy kids.

Sacramento Calorie Counts

I'm sitting in Sacramento Airport right now....I spent the weekend with Anthony's family which was pretty cool (Which is why I haven't commented on your blog this weekend!..or run much).  His mom is the most ridiculously good cook ever although I have to be careful because anytime I enter her kitchen she's got something delicious up her sleeve.  I've actually got a giant pan dulce she packed for me in my bag right now, just in case I have a craving for a giant pastry.  That pastry's days are numbered....

If you've never had one, run to your closest Mexican bakery and get one fresh.   

Besides the half pig in forms of bacon, ham, and carnitas I consumed this weekend, we also went wine tasting in Placerville.  It's weird I keep going wine tasting since I still haven't learned anything about wine.  We ordered a Pinot Gris (doesn't that mean grey?) and I had no idea what color wine was going to come out.  (WHITE!)  

A's Bro and Girl

A and Me

We so classsyyyyy:

It was a beautiful day!  I'm pretty sure the Sacramento - Tahoe - Yosemite corner of California is my favorite.  Beautiful and a little less crazy.  =).  San Francisco, I'm lookin' right at you when I think crazay

Since I've been in Sac Airport for the last couple hours, I did a little nutrition fact research:

In California (and I believe New York....dunno where else), they've started printing calories of menu items for chain restaurants.   

The first time I saw this reporting I was a little confused and thought for a second it was the price.  But hey, I'm not the most observant crayon in the box.  =).  

However, in general, I love this.  This way I won't get the snack size Rolo McFlurry with 510 calories when a cone would have done just as well.  Yeah yeah... I guess the real good alternative would be an apple.

The sweet tea's got like 320!  

I've definitely found myself shocked at the calorie content of some items, like random California Pizza Kitchen Salads.  The one thing I don't like about this Fast Food reporting is that it sort of oversimplifies nutrition facts..as though calories are the only thing that matter.  Well ok...and I also don't like that I'll never be able to enjoy a Rolo McFlurry or a Giant Chocolate muffin without guilt again.  Darn you FDA.

How much do you change what you order when you go out to eat based on nutrition facts?  

Are these lists up where you live?  

Annnnnd Rolo McFlurry...is it WORTH IT?  

=)

Luckily the pastry I've got in my bag is nutrition fact free....

Seattle the Bipolar

Good news and bad news:  

Bad News:  This weekend I ran a total of about 6 miles so I don't have much to talk about in that area.  My lack of running is mainly due to the fact that I want to really give my body a break, but I also prefer cuddling to running and I had the opportunity to do so this weekend so....heck yeah!

Good news is that I have cool travel pics from Seattle AND I think this week, I might actually run a track workout.  Imagine....=).  

Here's the deal with Seattle:  I've been going up there on a regular basis for the last 9 months or so bc the BF lives up there.  And until we invent the teleporter or cloning machine (let me know if you have one I can borrow), the regular visiting and plane flights are the best way I know how to keep up a romantic relationship.  

I know what you're thinking about Seattle....rain and 40 degree weather, right?  Well....kinda....

I have found that Seattle is the picture of misery from about November to early March.  Mid 40s, rain, and about 2 hours that are not pitch black.  But here's Seattle's bipolar secret.  From about May to August, it's freaking GLOORRIOUSSSS!    

Seriously.  This weekend, it was so sunny and full of spring flowers, I could have sworn I heard angels singing and kittens purring all weekend. 

Fremont Troll

We started out with brunch at Roxy's in Fremont.  Fremont is a neighborhood close to downtown Seattle that is famous for the Fremont Troll and has plenty of restaurants and bars to hang out in.   Roxy's is a delicious New York type deli that we go to bc it's easy to walk to and has food like this:

I forget what this was actually called on the menu, but essentially, it's a baklava pancake.  Filo, Walnuts, Pistachios,  Honey....really really good.  Anthony ordered them, but of course everything he orders is fair game, so I made short work of them =).  

We then went Seattle wine tasting.  While the ridiculously cold / rainy weather of western Washington isn't exactly conducive to grape growing apparently the weather of Eastern Washington is.  So they set up places just outside Seattle so that we can booze without driving across the state!  

Don't we look classy?  

Girly Girl Wines!

I pretty much let Anthony take the lead, since I really don't know the difference between a box of Franzia and something uhhh....better....

At one of the wineries, there was some club called the "girly girl" to encourage women to come with their girlfriends.  Since I like all things pink and targeted at women, I was super excited about by this and wished I had Seattle girlfriends to join with!  

The next day we went to the Fremont farmers market and saw this...

WHERE DO I SIGN UP??????

I also saw some really cute plant Brontosauruses:

  

So that's the story of the weekend, Morning Glories!  

And here's the Q and A portion where I try to elicit comments and make friends!    

Are any of you in Long Distance Relationships too (or ever were in one)?  

(if so comment with "heeellll yaaaaa!").  

Can you tell the difference between good and bad wine?  (I sure can't)

Also, if you had any amazing workouts or races, LET ME KNOW - I want to hear about it =).  

Happy Monday!